top five concert goers/ behaviors/ activities i hate

in no particular order:

1.  clapping.

clapping at shows is the bane of my existance.  i mean, unless the band specifically motions for you to clap along, don’t do it.  even if the band does, i still don’t clap, but then at least i can understand it coming from others.  no offense, brah, but after downing five rolling rocks in the parking lot and three molsons inside, your drunk ass is not, nor will it ever be, as good as the actual rythym section.  stop now.

2.   people who scream the lyrics to a song

yes, girl in the gauzy shirt that was at the keller williams show i attended tonight, yes.  i paid $23 to hear you shout yourself hoarse to “alligator alley” while slushing a wine cooler around.  yes, please “sing” louder.  no, louder.  almost.  okay, there it is.  i get it, you love the music and want/need to show your true fandom.  do that by growing dreads instead or something.

3.  glowsticks

they hurt when they hit you.  this one should be a no brainer.

4.  people who are too fucked up

you know the kind.  they are always standing immediately adjacent to you.  they flail their arms with no rhyme or reason, stumble-dance, spill their drink on you, or for the very unfortunate, they puke on you.

5.  those who have no respect for quiet parts of songs

now that i think about it, all of these pet peeves of mine could probably be displayed by the same person in a matter of a couple seconds.  it’s quiet.  it’s a pause.  it’s lovely.  it is not  an invitation for you to “WOOOOOO” as loud as you can or shout “I LOVE YOOOOOU TREEEEEEEEEEYYYYY!” as if you were speaking to someone thousands of miles away.  it is not your cue to scream as if you were being mugged in a dark alley.  silence:  learn it, love it, live it.